God decides to retire

After many years of service God decided it was time to retire. So he set up interviews with three people.


God: What Experience do you have?

Candidate#1: I ran a very large and successful company. I invested heavily in real estate and owned several of the tallest office buildings in the world. My company name is proudly displayed on the tops of them so that anyone could see them for many miles. My company commands respect. I had many thousands of employees so I know how tough and demanding a job like God could be.

God: Did you know everything going on at your company?

Candidate#1: No, of course not. I couldn’t be expected to know everything that goes on at my company. A good executive rules with strength and authority. My employees knew there would be punishment for disobeying me. My company installed cameras to watch over everyone to make sure they were doing what they were supposed to, but I hired many security guards to oversee that. I became the person that I am because I deserved it, worked harder than everyone else, and made sure everyone knew that I was in control.

God: Did you love your employees?

Candidate#1: A good executive only loves one thing and that is to glorify You in his work. Many of the people that worked for me were poor and lacked the proper intellect and education to better themselves. I gave them opportunities for a better life, but they would take advantage of you as much as possible if you showed them compassion. It was Your Grace that allowed me possession of the things that I had.

God: Did you love and protect your family?

Candidate#1: Of course. I raised my family in a very large house with a gate around it to protect them. My family had every need taken care of and I loved offering them financial and physical security even though I was most often occupied with building my business. All the work I did was for them and to glorify You. We were the happiest when my family did as I instructed them like a good parent should.

God: What did you see in the World?

Candidate#1: Because of the global reach of my company I had a private jet and could fly anywhere I wanted. I visited Italy, Japan, and France many times. I dined at the finest restaurants in the world and had a passion for collecting fine art. I have exquisite taste, respect for culture, and lived a life only worthy of You.


God: What Experience do you have?

Candidate#2: I am a specialized mechanic that works on machines like trains, trucks, planes, and ships. Because of that, I know how complex machinery works, much like the world. We have a network of machines that connects the entire world. There isn’t anywhere on earth that we can not ship supplies or materials. I worked almost everyday and never asked for a raise and never called in sick. When my company called me I was always there to fix complicated problems.

God: Did you know everything going on with the machines?

Candidate#2: There was not a machine that I could not fix and there is always a machine to make peoples lives better. I worked on and understood machines so that I could better know You. If you had not wanted us to build them then you would not have given us the tools and the knowledge.

God: Did you love your co-workers?

Candidate#2: My co-workers and I were like a family. We took care of each other. We always ate lunch together and protected one another. We were very highly organized.

God: Did you love and protect your family?

Candidate#2: Yes, I love my family very much. All the work I did was for them and to glorify You. I am as tough as it gets and I would kill anyone who tries to hurt me or my family. My enemies fear me and that is the best policy. My family knew that as long as they listened and respected me then I would always love them.

God: What did you see in the world?

Candidate#2: Because many of the machines I need to fix were located in various places I traveled only when I needed to. Most of the time I stayed near home because I wanted to be near my family in order to protect them. I saw my children go off to school and we would watch TV together when I got home. I would thankfully eat the dinners my spouse cooked for us. In my spare time I would fix things around the house because we couldn’t afford to have someone else do it. I kept my hands busy all the time to glorify You.


God: What Experience do you have?

Candidate#3: I am only a human with nothing more than authentic humility.

God: Did you know everything about humanity then?

Candidate#3: I felt like I was a million years old yet somehow still knew how to see the world through the eyes of a child when I needed to. I always sought to know myself so that I could better know you. My authentic humility helped me to realize that I knew everything and nothing at the same time.

God: Did you love humanity?

Candidate#3: I loved all things equally and unconditionally.

God: Did you love and protect your family?

Candidate#3: Yes, of course I loved my family unconditionally. I would do anything to protect my family, but my authentic humility helped me to realize that I really had nothing to fear.

God: What did you see in the world?

Candidate#3: Well, when I opened my mind it was like I could see everything in the world at the same time. I would sit on the edge of the water and watch just one fish or bird, but it was as if I could see all the fish in the sea and all the birds in the sky. When I opened my heart it was like I could see all the people in the world. I had compassion for every single one of them. I saw that, like the universe, my mind and my heart was infinite and my experiences were transitory. I saw You in one single snowflake. You could have been a million snowflakes all at once, but I realized that You only needed to be just One.

God: After listening to your answers I have decided that Candidate #3 is the best for the position.


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